Circus time!

I have never, ever been to a circus. Until recently! It's was Mike's, Blake's, and my first time to the Ringling Brothers Barnum & Bailey circus.

The show came up to Baltimore and we found tickets for close to 50% off. I didn't think of the seating because I figured it'll be fun regardless. There can't be a "bad" seat at the circus. Right?

Well, we arrived at the circus about 10 minutes late because Blake was napping in the car. We got to our section and handed the seating assistant our tickets. We didn't pay for Blake's ticket because kids under 2 are free as long as they sit on your lap.

She leads us down section 105... down... down... further down... Ok... we've basically reached the circus floor now. Yup... there are our seats! Section BB... the venue MADE the row by adding sections AA and BB right next to the circus performers. Crazy good seats! We sat down just as the horses were done performing and Blake exclaimed, "HORSE HORSE!"

He loved the music and watching the performers dance and jump around on trampolines. I'm not quite sure he really understood the tight rope (although he did say, "whoa" and "uh oh"). But every time an animal set came out, he would stand up and clap his hands and just smile from ear to ear. The tigers! The poodles! Oh man, he totally loved the poodles!! And the elephants! I absolutely loved the elephants.

I just hope the animals are properly cared for... I'm not sure how circuses work behind the scenes but it was a great performance nonetheless.

So glad we found discounted tickets! It was awesome!

Updates updates updates!

Yikes... so I know I said I've been busy but I didn't realize how long it's been since I posted.

A semi-quick update on what's been going on?

Blake is no longer a baby. He is a little person. 22 MONTHS! He's a little person that loves to run and talk and sing and dance. Everyday, he asks to go outside. My goodness... he can't get enough of the outdoors. It doesn't matter if it's snowing, raining, or thundering outside... he'll ask to "pay (play) outside"and beg and just wait by the front door until we go out. Hence... the reason I haven't been able to really sit down and blog. He loves to mix the dirt/mud like he's making soup, draw on the street with chalk, "paint" trees with his mud mixture, and follow bugs around. He likes to throw leaves in the air, roll around in them, and walk our dog. He stomps in puddles, rides a tricycle (with my assistance), and pushes his lawn mower around. He waves to all of the cars that pass by and asks them to "come back" when they leave.

He is finally getting the hang of using "please" in the right context and he started saying "thank you."

But an issue... well, not really an issue, but a little hiccup that we're having right now is that he tends to snatch toys from bigger kids and yell "NO" to them. Sometimes he'll smack them. :-/ We're working on learning that the other toys are "busy" and he can't just take them away. Oy... Any tips on handling this?

Also, our pup has been sick. He's 12 years old now and he still has some good ol' energy. He plays well... when he's in the mood to play. I took him to the vet to get a couple mass lumps removed but after a biopsy... we found out that he has cancerous cells. BD and I have been taking it one day at a time with Langston. It's incredibly tough to decide what we need to do for his comfort but I also understand that the longer we wait, the more pain he'll be in. So a lot of our time has been spent hanging out with him and taking him outside with us, too.

Oh, and if you haven't figured it out... BD and I are back together. Lovey dovey hearts all over! We've been working on it but last season (or maybe a little before that), we talked and talked and talked and realized we just needed to be together. As a couple. As a family. As best friends. With him and Blake and Langston... I've never felt so complete. :-)

Children's Museum - Rochester

A few weeks ago, we went up to Rochester, NY to visit BD's family.

We went on a work/school day so BD had to work from home and I usually keep Blake busy during the day. Sitting in front of the TV isn't our ideal kind of day... Blake gets antsy and goes wild and crazy. I figure if he's going to go wild and crazy, he might as well create something with his energy. So we do crafts, visit parks, go on play dates, and visit children's museums.

While we were in Rochester, we visited the one there. And it was AWESOME! We have one close to us in Baltimore, MD but it's NOTHING like the museum up north. Holy moly... there were activities and different rooms around every corner. It felt like the activities and play rooms never ended. Every 10 steps, there was something else to enjoy.

There was a Sesame Street themed part of the museum and Blake absolutely loved seeing the familiar faces of his favorite characters around the place. He event spent time in Elmo's World!

There were fish all over the place! When you walk in, there's a huge saltwater tank, and then more fish displayed as you continue to walk towards the activities. And koi fish in butterfly garden...

Yup... they even had a butterfly garden! It sounds pretty cheesy but it was actually really cool. It was very relaxing... calming for the kids...

Blake loved it! He chased the butterflies and one actually landed on him. He was so excited and wouldn't stop pointing at them. He's such a creature lover.

I'm definitely going to be looking for play places around our area that are more similar to that children's museum.

Feelings.

Prior to Blake, I was a Project Manager. Working full-time and loving the office environment. I worked as a PM in the I.T. field and also in the construction field. Both very opposite but the project management aspect was very similar. Managing projects.

I learned a lot. A lot about the I.T. industry. A lot about construction. A lot about time management. A lot about product delivery and customer service. And a lot about people.

I loved it.

Oh man, I truly loved it. I loved the feeling of having something to do, of being busy, of being needed. I enjoyed spending quality time with my teammates and stopping for a happy hour after work to reward ourselves for getting through another tough day.

I never, ever thought I'd be a stay-at-home-mom. When I used to dream of having children, I thought I'd still be a working mom.

But now I am the mom I never dreamed of being. Once Blake was born, I felt the absolute most rewarding feeling. The labor pains? Hardest work I've ever done. Not sleeping for over a year and being "on call" 24 hours a day, 7 days a week? I accept the challenge! Listening to a toddler throw tantrums all day? My hearing abilities have adapted so I can automatically lower down the volume in my head. No sick days? Fine.

My world has completely flipped and I've been upside down for 20 months now. Taking it one day at a time.

I worked part-time from home last year and I'm also nannying, but it's nothing like what I used to do.

I applied for a Project Management position yesterday...

And I cried. Who does that? I didn't even get a call back to interview but I spoke with the hiring director and sent my resumé in.

I was thinking of why I broke down like that. And after sleeping it off, I think it's because my heart just yearns to be with Blake right now. I love my new "job" too much. My responsibilities and job description have changed tremendously but... that's it... I LOVE IT. I can't imagine him being in a daycare setting for nine hours a day (yet). Maybe when he can communicate a little more?

So why did I apply for a FT out-of-home job? Because I know family and "friends" and just people around us ask what I do all day? They ask what I contribute to the table for my family.

I shouldn't have to explain myself. I work hard. I'm up at 6 am every day, even on weekends, to make sure my family has everything they need for the day. I nanny from home and entertaining and caring for two kids versus one can be a challenge. And they NEVER nap at the same time. :-P

image captured by HeartLove Photography

My passion is to explore this new world with my son and continue to feed our relationship with love. To think about all that he knows and all that he does came from me is just... amazing. I taught him. And I will gladly continue to teach him for as long as I can. He is my reason...

Soccer

Blake started soccer classes yesterday. I signed him up for one clinic which is 6 weeks long with a Certifikid deal. I figured it was a good deal, and for 6 weeks of activity and social interaction with other kids it was a little cheaper than his My Gym classes.

His classes are Saturday mornings. I honestly thought it would be a class with a few little ones running around just kicking the ball and playing. But it was actually really organized and really encouraged the kids to work on their hand-eye coordination and listening skills.

I was so proud of Blake! He hasn't really picked up on the kicking motion yet but he did really well after watching the other kids kick the ball. There were times when he still picked the ball up with his hands, but the instructor was very kind and gentle in teaching him to kick instead.

What made me so proud was that Blake did really well at following directions... and he TRIED! He really tried to kick the ball. He did great at "Stop and Go" and "Fast and Slow." They were both games the instructor did where the kids lined up side by side and as the instructor said "fast" the kids would run fast towards the goal on the other end, "slow" and the kids would walk slowly to the goal, "stop" and of course they would stop.

He had fun and we could see he enjoyed himself!

We can't wait to back this coming Saturday! We'll be practicing our kicking skills until then.

The beginning of THE STORY...

Before Blake...

12 1/2 years ago...

December 2000.

I was working at the mall. My first "real" job that I landed on my own. At Forever 21. ;) Oh yes.

It was December 23rd and almost closing time during holiday hours. The mall finally died down and everyone was probably already wrapping presents for their friends and families or maybe even preparing to travel. But of course, guys don't shop until last minute so...

There was this guy that walked in with some buddies. He had a black peacoat on, perfectly styled hair, and the most handsome face. Almost immediately I remember telling a coworker and good friend of mine that I thought he was cute.

"Wow. He's cute," I said.

"Ewwwww! Stop! I know him. He goes to my school. Don't waste your time," she said.

"What?! I just said he was cute."

And it ended at that.

Or so I thought.

Five minutes later, my friend walked up to me and said, "Hey Erin. Can you help me find a present? I have to do something." Off she went, smiling and giggling, and left him standing there in front of me. The smell of his cologne seduced me. I nearly died from being overwhelmed with his darlingness.

Great. Nervous wreck in action...

The mall closed at 11 and I remember it definitely being past 10 when he walked in. He gave me the most difficult time. "I need to find a present for my sister."

But he didn't know what she wanted. Oh, and by the way, I found out almost a year later that "his sister" was actually a girl he was dating at the time we met. :-/ But I guess that's besides the point because... I won! LOL

We had some small talk, exchanged names, but no contact information. Great... so all of that work, and nothing? NOTHING?! Guess homeboy wasn't interested. I put my finest out on the line, too. :-P

I let it go.

But the next day, I worked and there he was. With more friends. He said they had to shop so he just wanted to hang out with them. Again, still no contact information exchanged. I know I was young, but I swear this is what flirting was supposed to be like. Right?

I talked to my girlfriend and asked her to put a feeler out there since she went to school with him. She talked to his sister and got his phone number for me. But that's creepy, right? I didn't want to be the first one to call. I'm a girl. Girls aren't supposed to make the first call.

The new year rolled around and he would stop by here and there with his friends. But nothing ever happened. Until the weekend of Superbowl Sunday 2001.

Two of his friends shopped at the store. Homeboy wasn't with them. But I recognized them and before they left I asked for a minute of their time.

"Hey guys... do you know Mike?"

"Uh yeah... yeah. We do," one of the them said.

"Can you give him my number, please?" Shit... too straightforward? Too late now!

"Yeah! We'll see him for the Superbowl."

I offered my thanks and felt extremely stupid afterwards. If the guy wanted to talk to me, he would've just asked me for my number, right? Damn. Stupid stupid stupid. I even remember hitting my forehead like I was an idiot.

Still nothing. No call. No text. Nothing from my friend. My friend told me to just call him. His sister said he was interested. But that would be even more idiotic of me. I tried once. The rest was up to him... if he was even interested. So I moved on...

18 Months

Blake reached 18 months... a solid YEAR AND HALF! Time sure does fly right on by since I was blessed with this kid.

18 months.

That's big boy status right there!

We had his check up yesterday and thankfully the only shot he received was his flu shot. (Yeah, I know... I'm a little late but at least we got it done.) He's in the 25th percentile for his weight... he's always been a slender little dude. But he shot back up from the 70th percentile in height all the way to the 95th percentile! Tall and thin. I'm not quite sure where he gets that from but I love it! He's perfect to me and really the percentile charts are just blah to me anyway but it was cool to see where he is compared to other kiddies.

He loves playing at the doctor's office but once the nurse or his doctor come into the room, he clams up and gets really nervous. So sad that he knows when he sees them it means shots. He doesn't cry long but when he does, man, it's heartbreaking. I love his doctor though. She's a doll and so super friendly and very personal. I know she sees a ton of kids but she acts like Blake is the only one in the world. It's just so darling. We're thankful we found her!